⊗ The Best of Internet ⊗

This innovative lock is designed by Art Lebedev Studio Constructed of 100% titanium alloy, nothing less than a level forty-two spell of ultimate cutting will break the Defendius lock open. Really, just look at it: no one is getting out easily. You'll have to guide the lock nib through the labyrinth before you can open to door. There is only one solution, so no cheating will help. Maybe when confronted with the Defendius Labyrinth Security Lock, your date will reconsider your offer of playing the game of love in co-op mode. And don't worry, these locks were tested by robots and confirmed to be the strongest lock commercially available. So, install a Defendius Labyrinth Security Lock today, and make sure your next date gets to the bonus level.

Please Note: TheBestofInternet does not condone forced captivity - no matter how desperate you are.

It happens every day, guys.
And it could be happening to you RIGHT NOW.
Next time you steer your browser over to MySpace, Facebook, or any other social networking or dating site, take a real close look at the lighting in those pictures. Check out that angle shot for what it really is. Because you may be staring at what may ultimately go down in history as the perfect crime. Because whether it’s you or the next guy that comes along, someone is destined to get all the lovin’ that they can handle.

So cute. So nubile. So pale. So pained, but beautiful:

So where the HELL did CarrotTop come from?!?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Great smile and pretty eyes.
She tells you that’s her brother beside her so you won’t be jealous.

But it wasn’t her brother. It was her last dinner. And you’re next.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nothing cuter than a little emo dreamer
in the over-the-head angle shot

Oh my! Quick! Raise the camera up! Up, I say!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

This pic is all sweet.
Definitely a lady you want to take home to meet mom:

But the second pic is of a chick that will fight you for the last beer!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cute and coy. And that shot of the “goods” is certainly an accident:

Looks like there are plenty more “goods” where those came from.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

And finally, one late night you asked your beauty for some boob shots:

And you GOT ‘EM!